Why You Shouldn’t Skip Another Vacation
You don't have to actually fish. Just go.
When it comes to roles and responsibilities, stepparenting is as stressful as it gets. I hope you’ll have a look at my latest post for PsychologyToday.com on why you can’t afford to skip a real vacation this year! Once you learn the facts about why you have to do it, tell me here and now: what are your vacation plans?
Tags: mental and physical health benefits of vacation, psychology today, step mother, stepfamily, stepmonster, stepmother, stepmother advice, stepmother support, vacation, wednesday martin
July 7th, 2010 at 2:02 pm
Phytoncides. Huh. I’m sure I’m “bathed” in them right now. But even so I have an infected spider bite on my leg. Nature is good for you on the whole, but it’s also kind of mean. For example, global climate change will probably end up eliminating humans.
Still, I agree that “vacations” are good for you, provided you have something to do during your vacation. Right now I am growing a lot of food, picking a lot of wild food, and canning a lot of food.
Maybe the best vacation away from a city is where you go work on a farm. Just hanging out at the beach is kind of boring after a while.
July 7th, 2010 at 2:49 pm
What can I say, I’m an avid hiker. When my husband is driving me crazy by not parenting his kids, and his kids are acting just the way you would expect them to since they’re not parented well, I head for a local hiking trail. We’re surrounded by woods. I can’t even tell you how much of a difference a hike makes for me–it alters my mood. Recently my 12-year-old stepdaughter, who is interested in all things dark, stormy, moody, and solitary, has started to join me sometimes on my walks in the woods. It’s a good way for us to be together without needing to talk a lot because I instituted a “quiet” rule the first time she asked to join me on a walk. It gives us both a breather. Who knew I could teach her something?
July 7th, 2010 at 2:51 pm
I want to take our kids on a “farm” vacation so Da Wiznitch here is making me laugh. There is a farm in a nearby state where you can take your kids and they do chores. It really appeals to me. My husband jokes that he doesn’t want to make the same mistakes he made with the kids from his first marriage–he calls them allergic to chores–but that I’m taking it a bit far. I do think it will be a fun and relaxing way for them to learn responsibility in another context. And now that I’ve read this piece I’ll be going for some walks in the woods!
July 8th, 2010 at 7:38 am
I bet they charge a lot to “let” kids do chores on their farm! That would be pretty stressful for me: a bunch of kids I don’t know trying to help me.
A simpler thing might be an expedition to pick blueberries or something.
A more elaborate farm vacation is where you intern on an organic farm:
http://www.wwoof.org/
In this case you’re there long enough to really learn some skills and become useful to yourself and other people.
July 8th, 2010 at 9:12 am
Wow, what perfect timing. We are headed on vacation tomorrow and the best part — without kids! Yes, we are leaving them all behind so it shall be five days of time alone with my hubby. I was feeling a bit guilty, but this article alleviated the feeling.
Thanks again for another timely article.
Bon Voyage!
July 8th, 2010 at 3:31 pm
Vacations are the necessary spice of life…like I wrote in the comments on your article is that a vacation is the opportunity to recreate…RE-CREATE. Now, that’s a powerful change up on a word too many people think is frivilous.
I vacation as often as possible. Whether it’s a staycation on my back porch with a good Zombie book or a daycation hike up north or a 4 day retreat at Kripalu or the five or six days I’ll be in Spain for my birthday or…oh hec, you get the point
xo
July 24th, 2010 at 7:36 am
Oh dear! I am doing all the wrong things……last year’s vacation was so traumatic, I vowed i wouldn’t do another one! At least, not until we can go without kids, which might actually be next year. Imagine, if you will, five sullen teenagers, all bored in a very small, old-fashioned Spanish seaside town. One is awaiting exam results we know are going to be disappointing and has turned into a dependent four year-old. He is 19. Another 19 year old has weight issues (he has since lost the weight after beginning College this year) A younger 16 year old really can’t cope with the social pressure and plays his game boy constantly. 16 year old stepdaughter has been allowed a friend. Big mistake. She thinks she is 18, the friend she has been allowed to bring has high hopes of a low level of adult supervision and is sadly disappointed by the evening curfew
She is also missing the level of attention she gets in her close, nuclear family and can’t cope with our odd not-exactly- blended family. She winds teenage stepdaughter up to a pitch- I become even more horrible than usual, and suddenly, stepdaughter is constantly wanting Daddy, trying to prove something about how much her daddy loves her to her friend, perhaps. Who knows. They all just consume food and drink and sulk. The “villa” has the most uncomfortable beds in the known universe. Nobody talks and I begin to resent them. The villa next door is burgled, the police don’t even turn up.The sun shines, I am desperate to be home in the rain. Sad, sad, sad. Honestly, one of the most stressful weeks of my life!
July 29th, 2010 at 11:52 am
That was a great article in Psychology Today. I sent it to my father actually. Our last vacation together was two years ago. We take road trips together. Don’t plan. Just pick a direction and drive. Last time we made it all the way to Halifax Nova Scotia. For some people, no planning might add to the stress but I think its the sense of adventure, and having no plans that makes it relaxing for him. And me too.