Archive for the ‘misc’ Category

Sticks and Stones…A Stepmother’s Guide to Being Disliked

Tuesday, August 10th, 2010

Being disliked takes a toll on women especially


I recently wrote an article about Stepmothers and being disliked (look for it in the September Issue of StepMom Magazine). Tolerating that others may dislike us for reasons beyond our control, and in spite of our best efforts, is an important skill to develop.

Tell me about it: Have you dealt with feeling disliked in your life as a woman with stepchildren? How did you/do you handle it? What strategies help?

What are the two most powerful words in a remarriage with children?

Tuesday, August 3rd, 2010

What are they saying?!


The August issue of Stepmom Magazine is live! In it you will find lots of helpful articles that address the topics that matter to you, including mine on the two most powerful words in a remarriage with children…Mary Kelly-Williams on grief in stepfamilies; Peggy Nolan on remarriage with kids and military deployment; as well as fantastic pieces by Joan Sarin, Susan Swanson, Susan Wisdom, and many other experts on repartnership with children. You’ll have to subscribe to read the articles…but it’s well worth the price. I know, it’s really cheap of me to set you up this way.

Happy reading!

How do you do it?

Monday, August 2nd, 2010

Does this symbol scare you?


Ah, that hot, vexed topic: money. Divvying it up can be tricky in any partnership. Now throw in some kids from a previous marriage, and it becomes more complicated still. Merged? Partially merged? Totally separate bank accounts? Peggy Nolan and Erin Erickson tackle this topic with their guest Kat Nelson-Reid, a stepmom and financial planner, on tonight’s Stepmom’s Toolbox Radio Show at 8 pm EST. To tune in, click on this link:

http://www.blogtalkradio.com/thestepmomstoolbox/page/2

You can also check out the interview I did with Erin and Peggy a few months ago.

Happy listening.

Susan Swanson’s Radio Show on Relationships–Monday July 5!

Friday, July 2nd, 2010

Not just another pretty face--Susan Swanson really gets it


Sure, it’s a long holiday weekend. BBQs, fireworks…and for some of us in stepfamilies, stress. “Coming together” can be fraught when it’s a yours, mine, and ours situation as in a remarriage or repartnership with kids. That’s why Susan Swanson’s Monday July 5 radio show is so timely. Check out the list of upcoming shows too. Susan is the founder of the Stepfamily Center of Los Angeles, a gifted and experienced therapist–and has walked the stepmother walk!

Is Your Spouse Keeping Secrets From You? Good!

Wednesday, June 9th, 2010

She learned about his secret life and found it exciting
Hope you will check out my most recent article for psychologytoday.com on partnership, love, and lust. What role do secrets and novel experiences play in keeping marriages alive?

Tell me about it: Do you keep secrets from your husband or partner? Your comments will be kept secret, as always…

Fighting Well, Fighting Fair in June issue of StepMom Magazine

Friday, June 4th, 2010

Worth every penny

Worth every penny


Hope you will check out the June issue of StepMom magazine. Yes, you’ll have to subscribe–but it’s worth it! This month’s articles include one by me on how remarried with kids fight–everything you need to know about “conflict by proxy”. That’s when you have your husband or partner’s feelings for him, or fight his battles for him.

Also look for helpful articles by Mary Kelly Williams (on money!), Jacque Fletcher, and many more.

TELL ME ABOUT IT: How did your last fight with your husband or partner go? Was it productive?

Stepmothers/Older Mothers: an Anthropologist on Why We Do What We Do When We Do It

Tuesday, May 25th, 2010

Many women with stepchildren are also "older" mothers. Ahem.
I asked Kermyt G. Anderson, an evolutionary biologist and anthropologist, to weigh in on the topic of delayed childbearing. You know, older mothers! He makes the interesting point that in stepfamilies, we’re often pushing our reproductive careers to the max, since we might be repartnering a little later in life post-divorce (or breakup), and then wanting to have a child or a family.

Sound familiar?

Check out KG’s guest post on my psychologytoday.com blog. You might check out his wonderful new book, too: Fatherhood: Evolution and Human Paternal Behavior

Glee Gets Real about American Families

Tuesday, May 4th, 2010

Oh please, we're like, so NOT the Brady Bunch??

Oh please, we're like, so NOT the Brady Bunch??


Do you watch Glee? Are you obsessed? Even if the answer is no and no, please check out my new article on Psychology Today about Glee and the “blended family” paradigm…

http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/stepmonster/201005/glee-and-american-families-were-not-the-brady-bunch

Sandra Bullock’s Saga: Step/Mother in the Spotlight

Wednesday, April 28th, 2010

Well, who knows? But she is a mother now. Will she remain a stepmother?

Well, who knows? But she is a mother now. Will she remain a stepmother?


If you’ve been on my blog before you know that I am a celebrity/popular culture junkie. Since November, I’ve been following the Sandra Bullock saga (who hasn’t?) and writing about it here, on Psychology Today and The Huffington Post. So, Sandra’s now a mother and an ex-stepmother-to-be. What does it matter? Hope you’ll check out my latest article on Psychology Today–and leave a comment!

http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/stepmonster/201004/what-the-sandra-bullock-saga-can-teach-us-about-stepmotherhood

Sandra Bullock Is Us–on Psychologytoday.com

Wednesday, March 24th, 2010

The cultural pressure on Sandra Bullock to be a stepmartyr is enormous

The cultural pressure on Sandra Bullock to be a stepmartyr is enormous


Are you following the Sandra Bullock/Jesse James breakup story? Have a look at my latest piece for psychologytoday.com–and please leave a comment!