Any multi-tasking mom or woman with stepkids might relate to this…please have a read and post a comment on my newest piece for the Huffington Post!
Posts Tagged ‘mother’
Please check out my latest post on psychologytoday.com about the custody battle between Sandra Bullock, Jesse James, and his ex Janine Lindemulder
Have you been following the story about the family that adopted a one-year-old baby, but decided they couldn’t continue to be his parents after 18 months? Please check out my new post on my Psychology Today blog: ” ‘I don’t want this baby after all!’: Judging Anita Tedaldi.”
Here she goes again, this time on the cover of today’s New York Post as it hawks her Vanity Fair cover and cover story . She may be a Victoria’s Secret undewear model, but she’s also a dreadful cliche when she preens, of her toddler stepson, “he’s 100% mine” and “I already feel like he’s my son, from the first day.” While also claiming, in the same interview, “I respect that he has a mother.”
Really? Then back off with the overreaching, the presumptuous claims to motherhood, and the possessiveness and territoriality that would set anybody who had actually gestated him for 40 difficult weeks (or done all the grueling paperwork, interviews, and obsessive worrying for an adoption), pushed him out (or travelled across the world to get him, or gone through the harrowing process of waiting to see if the birth mother right across town would change her mind), been up all night with him for weeks on end for every-two-hours feedings and sleep training, and endured all the hormonal, emotional heaven and hell that is parenting an infant, into a righteous rage.
“I want him to have a great relationship with his mom, because that’s important…but it’s not like because somebody else delivered him, that’s not my child.” Uh, yes, in fact, it is. Gisele is the stepmom, not the mom. If she wants a good relationship with her stepson, she needs to start the process of minimizing conflict with his mother right now. And that means backing down, reeling it in a bit, not antagonizing in person or in print, and knowing her place. Just ask a stepchild: as I researched my book, dozens of them told me that, as much as they may have liked having an auxiliary, loving, grown-up in their lives, no good ever came of a stepmother pretending to be a mother.