Wednesday Martin

Susan Wisdom, LPC, is answering a question she hears a lot when she does therapy with couples in repartnerships with children: “How do we balance the needs of his kids with our needs as a couple?”

Have a look at her piece, “Your Needs, the Kids’ Needs–What’s a Stepcouple to Do?”

And let me know: How do you and your husband or partner balance these needs?

As promised, an article about love, sex, and romance in stepfamilies as we count down to Valentine’s Day. Today’s guest post is by Susan Wisdom, LPC. Susan wants to know, Why are you obsessed with your husband’s ex? And she wants you to put your marriage first. Have a look…and leave a comment!:

http://www.stepcoupling.com/2010/01/why-do-you-care-about-the-ex/comment-page-1/#comment-295

The December Issue of Stepmom magazine is here (www.stepmommag.com)! Lots of great reading as you gear up for your winter holiday nervous breakdown–Mary Kelly provides a priceless window onto an ex-wife’s (temporary) divorce regret; the sassy and hilarious Belle Mere remembers her first Christmas with sprogs; Erin Erickson on being a heavy-lifting “single” stepmom whose husband is out of town more often than not; Peggy Nolan on a stepfamily wedding; therapists/authors/experts Jacque Fletcher, Susan Swanson and Susan Wisdom all share their wisdom on topics from holiday survival to Mad Men; party girl Izzy Rose gives tips on how to do it right; I write about avoiding holiday stepmartyr syndrome; and Joel Schwartzberg tells divorced and remarried dads what they owe their partners–that would be US! There’s more where that came from. Believe it. Buy it. Read it.

Susan Wisdom, author of Stepcoupling, wrote a guest post on my Psychology Today blog today. Hope you’ll have a read…and leave a comment:

http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/stepmonster/200911/teens-can-drive-you-nuts-especially-when-theyre-not-yours

When the author of a classic in stepfamily studies emails you out of the blue to praise your book, it’s incredibly exciting and gratifying. When she’s also an expert stepfamily therapist who has made a career of saving the most endangered marriages of all–well, even more so. And when she’s the person who coined the term “stepcoupling,” it’s reason to crow. So pardon me if I crow, for just one second. In Susan’s words:

“She’s done it! Martin has told the TRUTH about being a stepmother, backed up with extensive research, interviews, and stories. With deep understanding and empathy for women with stepchildren, Stepmonster will inspire stepcouples, benefitting them and their kids.

I wholeheartedly endorse this surprising, honest, fascinating book and will recommend it to anyone on the journey of stepcoupling, stepparenting, and especially stepmothering.”

My goodness, I have to lie down now. Meanwhile, check out Susan’s book, Stepcoupling, available in bookstores and on-line, and as I have mentioned, a classic in stepfamily studies. The link to her website is on my blog list of resources: www.stepcoupling.com